N.T. Wright cheats at Scrabble

Well, I’ve really been enjoying N.T. Wright lately, but I just discovered one of the new books Micahel Spencer has been contracted to write is described as such:

N.T. Wright Is A Cross-Dressing Communist Sissy Who Cheats At Scrabble And Really Worships The Devil: I’d serve as editor for this serious and dispassionate examination of N.T. Wright by various well-known reformed bloggers.

Oh my gosh! I never knew. And I just played Scrabble last night with my wife. And I was tempted to cheat! Especially after she whipped my tail by dumping her board to spell “Unicorn” on a triple-word-score and rake in 80 points. Now that I’ve identified the source of corruption, I can stick it to the Devil. I dropped my copy of The New Testament and the People of God like third period French.

All that church history wasn’t a ton of help anyway. I think I could get more use out of one of Michael’s previous works:

This Is Your Best Wife? Wow: This book helps husbands do all the little things that will change their wives from dowdy church matrons to hot pastorettes. Special section on how to behave on an airplane.

While I wait for Amazon to hook me up, I’ll stick to some approved C.S. Lewis stuff (with all the parts of purgatory crossed out with a sharpie of course).