Concerning Luther’s childhood discipline:
Medically-minded biographers may go a bit too far in saying that Luther’s nervous system was undermined in those days. It is certain, however, that the disciplinary climate of home and school, and the religious climate in community and church, were lumped together in his mind as decidedly more oppressive than inspiring; and that, to him, this seemed a damned and unnecessary shame. He blamed his atmosphere for his special monkishness, his intensity of monastic “scrupulosity,” his obsessional preoccupation with the question of how on earth one may do enough to please the various agencies of judgment teacher, father, superior, and most of all, one’s conscience.
-Erik Erikson, Young Man Luther, p. 78
As a parent, I really want to keep the car on the road with this. It’s really easy to drive off into the ditch of permissiveness and tolerance of sin and rebellion. This largely produces brats with a sense of entitlement. Luther experienced mostly the opposite. The other ditch is repressive submission to authorities (of all types, not just the good kind!) and demanding conformity to the obvious stifling of creative energy and joy.
This is why good parenting is hard work. You have to keep your eye on the road all the time. What do you do when you get sleepy?
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March 15th, 2010 at 4:52 PM
Pull off the road and take a break. Let Wifey drive for a day or two while you hang out in the coffee shop blogging about parenting *wink*. It’s why God meant families to have two parents!
This is good stuff. I want to get this right too… the ever-present balance between justice and mercy that God seems to always get right with us but that we almost never get right with our kiddos.
I think it helps to surround ourselves with other parents who also try to balance authority with grace. And use wisdom in following the bombardment of opinions out there on what exactly it looks like to go about it “the right way.”
March 15th, 2010 at 5:01 PM
Haha! Good idea.
Surround yourself with other people trying to stay on the road definitely helps. I think you are right about the bombardment of opinions out there. It’s one thing to read or talk about them. It’s another to see them played out in others. Maybe a good idea here, but with potholes to watch out for, etc. This stuff has to be lived out in the context of your own kids to determine it’s value. Sometimes this can be done via empathy and foresight, but goombas are not alwasy predictable!